My Life Uncensored
The Weight The past few days have felt heavy in a quiet way. Not loud. Not dramatic. It’s the kind of weight that sits behind your ribs. It makes your breathing feel a little shallower when the room gets too still. I’ve been carrying something that doesn’t fully make sense. The kind of invisible blame … Read more
The last few days have been a slow slide into gray. Snow falls outside, heavy and relentless, like the sky is trying to bury the world quietly. I lie in bed, lights still on, watching YouTubers scream through multiplayer matches while I hover somewhere between entertained and completely detached. Explosions on screen. Silence in the … Read more
Today is… actually good. Like, my brain isn’t screaming at me for once. It’s quiet. Calm. Steady. And honestly, that alone feels like a small victory. But wait there’s more ! Call of Duty has been going surprisingly well. Or at least, I haven’t accidentally blown myself up yet. I’ve been sticking to core, because … Read more
I was in bed. Blanket pulled up. Water at my lips. My brain wouldn’t stop. Loops spinning, tightening, asking the same questions I’m sick of answering: why am I always alone? Why can’t I feel light? Why does it always feel like it’s me against everything? I hated it. I hated the ache. I hated … Read more
I live on the edges of other people’s lives. Not missing—just not needed. I’m the one you talk to when there’s no better choice. The placeholder. The almost. People don’t leave with a bang. They drift away, forget to reply, pick someone else, and don’t even realize they’ve chosen. Somehow, I’m always on the losing … Read more
At night, I tear myself apart. Not just in my mind, but with precision. I lay out every part of me on a cold table and start slicing through—thought by thought, memory by memory until nothing feels human anymore. I go over my life like it’s evidence in a case where I’m both the victim … Read more